Homeschooling an Aspie

The whole reason that we started homeschooling was because of our Aspie child. He was unofficially diagnosed by me and some teachers didn't believe me. Others had never even heard of Asperger Syndrome. IEP's were a joke. My child was bullied and suicidal. It was time for a change!

Our new pediatrician insisted on a "real" diagnoses by a "professional". $5,000.00 and a few office trips later, we had one on paper. It had stated all the diagnoses that I had given him. ASPERGER SYNDROME, SENSORY INTEGRATION DYSFUNCTION, DEPRESSION, OPPOSITIONAL DEFIANCE DISORDER (and a strong AVERSION TO ALL FOODS but 5: processed meat, cheese, yogurt, fries and sugar). Yes, that last part about the food I added, but it was another piece we had to deal with. He was on multi-vitamins and had his organ functions checked every couple of years, because he refused to eat fruit, vegetables, nuts, rice, noodles, soups, real meat, and consumed way too much dairy and sugar. He also TOE WALKED. This led to thousands of dollars and years of leg braces and physical therapies-none of which did a thing to change his walking. He went from a talented elementary-aged baseball player, to a teen who still walks on his toes and can't walk well, much less run. 

Those parents who have kids with Asperger's, need no explanation as to the difficulties you and your children face. Here is how to make life easier: homeschool. Here is how you make homeschooling an Aspie easier...

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~Deschool. Spend time after you pull your child out of public/private school, to let him/her unwind. This is time you use to prepare yourself and your child's curriculum. Two months is average for deschooling.

~Get a punching bag. Change is hard and confusing. Anger issues surface. Unless you want your walls and possessions to suffer, let them punch a punching bag. It is a wall saver. Pillows and old mattresses work too. Treadmill/outdoor walks are a bonus.

~Create a dim-lit, very quiet, uninterrupted, sibling-free, work zone. A doors-shut work room. This is usually a bedroom, or an office. Allow as much time as needed for your child to feel safe in there. He will not be like other children. Don't expect him to come out of the room as much as other children. This will be where he can concentrate on his school work.

~Allow for headphones and music. Unless you are talking directly to your child, allow them to always use headphones and to play music when studying.

~Don't expect eye contact. This takes time to learn and is so uncomfortable for an Aspie, that it shouldn't be required.

~Keep the school day short. Three subjects a day, plus exercise (gym), chores (home ec) and documentaries (science and social studies) and computer/other hobby should complete the day. If he/she likes to read, that is reading. Let them choose the book/comic book/book of facts. I would not recommend more than 2 to 3 sit-down subjects a day.

~Eating and Learning with siblings is torture. Smells, lights, noise, are all PAINFUL distractions. Research Sensory Integration Dysfunction, or Sensory Issues, because this almost always coincides with Asperger Syndrome.

~Remember to compliment and (carefully) hug your Aspie! Be patient and LISTEN to their "little professor" lectures as they pace across the floor. What they say is important to them, just as your lectures to your kids are important to you.

~Don't expect cursive, or even good handwriting. Allow them to type. Motor skills are extremely hard for most Aspies as well.

~Let them hone in on a skill or hobby. Don't expect them to play sports, music and join a social group.

~Be realistic. Educate yourself.

~Be patient, loving and ACCEPTING for who they are. Don't mold them into a round peg and shove them into a mold. They are square. They like being square.

~See their gifts. Help them build on them by giving them the tools they need. This may be footing the bill for their own computer, science kits, history books, lego collection, etc. You will usually save on the costs of sports and other classes/groups. So, use this budget on these.

~Know it is a long road. Two steps forward, one step back. It is a dance.

~Compliment and build self-esteem. Never put down your child and become a bully of sorts yourself. 

~Don't call the cops when times get physical. Give them space. Direct to punching bag. Hug when melt-down is over.

~Don't institutionalize. I was a Residential Treatment Counselor for teens. I would never recommend this. Ever.

~Pat yourself on the back. You are a great parent! You can do this!


See www.mylittleprofessor.com for more insight.